@Background Pony #4033  
But wait, I don’t even see myself in there, so what toaster are you talking about?

@Prometheus labs CEO  
yeah it was so scared it stopped doing that.

@Background Pony #C15B  
Don’t you mean I started screaming

the toaster started screaming

@Background Pony #B446  
Wait, so Richard’s dead? I’m assuming he is or they would’ve taken him in as a POI or given him class-c amnestics. Class-c is for erasing large amounts of specific memories

@Background Pony #C460  
That was beautiful! I will now fave your comment!

@Background Pony #C460  
Amnestics are the chemicals/drugs/injections/what-have-you given to erase memories.
 
Amnesiacs are people who have trouble remembering things.
 
While articles do split between the two sometimes, amnestic is the preferred word in most cases. Just some random examples:
 
-http://www.scp-wiki.net/amnestic-orientation-manual  
-http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1663  
-http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-351  
-http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-868  
-http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-406
 
And so on.
 
Though technically it doesn’t matter, since there’s no such thing as true canon in the SCP universe, so I’m just being pedantic. Just my 2 bits.
 
Also, Dr. Bright makes everything better.

@Drefsab  
Also, did you like my inclusion of Dr. Bright? xD

@Drefsab  
All of the articles I have read list them as amnesiacs.

@Background Pony #C460  
Well done! Minor detail: it should be “amnestics”, not “amnesiacs”.

Here’s an actual SCP style documentation style because I have too much spare time
 
Item#: SCP-406538
 
Object Class: Euclid Safe
 
Special Containment Procedures: Item SCP-406538 is to be kept in standard Class 1 living quarters. Meals of a standard vegetarian variety are to be served 3 times a day. No personell without Class 2 verification or higher are allowed to interact with SCP-406538 if it has reached it’s monthly allowance of peanut butter. SCP-406538 may be allowed to roam Site 19 with armed escort. Under no circumstances is SCP-406538 allowed access to the kitchen or any cooking appliances. Any claims from SCP-406538 as being a “Kitchen Pro” are entirely fallacious and should be ignored. Dr. Bright is no longer allowed to have contact with SCP-406538.  
Come on guys, seriously. She’s a goddamned horse! I don’t care how cute she is, she cannot cook! Dr. Clef
 
Description: SCP-406538 appears to be a female subspecies of equus caballus, approximately 1 meter in height overall, and 20 centimeters in height at the withers. It has a light brown coat with dark brown mane and tail. SCP-406538 is sentient and is capable of verbal communication. SCP-406538 claims to be from an alternative universe that is populated entirely by other’s of it’s kind. SCP-406538 possesses an as of yet unexplained ability to pick up items with the underside of the hoof. SCP-406538 claims that this ability comes naturally to itself and others of it’s kind. SCP-406538 appears to be highly sociable and claims that it’s name is “Brownie Bun”, and it has also stated that it dislikes being referred to as SCP-406538. SCP-406538 claims to be married to a human man named [DATA EXPUNGED].  
I feel sorry for that poor sap. Dr. Clef
 
Anamolous effects from SCP-406538 have been observed, and include a detrimental affect to kitchen appliances and any food items currently cooking. Any food items prepared by SCP-406538 have a 45% chance of combustion within 3-5 minutes, regardless of water concentration or heat.  
See Addendum 406538-A for an example of SCP-406538’s anamolous effects
 
No major memetic effects have been observed. SCP-406538 possesses a minor memetic influence over personell who have hugged it, brushed it’s mane, or made contact with a fluffy portion of it’s chest it refers to as it’s “Floof”. Memetic effects have been observed to exponentially increase in potency when SCP-406538 has consumed peanut butter.
 
 
Addendum 406538-A
 
SCP-406538 was allowed permission by Dr. Bright to access the kitchen at Site 19. The following is an audio log of the incident.
 
Dr. Bright: So, what are you cooking for us today, Brownie?
 
SCP-406538: Well, since you guys tend to always eat all this bland stuff, I thought I’d spruce up your meals with some tasty salads!
 
Dr. Bright: Are you certain you can handle this, Brownie?
 
SCP-406538: Pfft, I do this all the time for my husband [DATA EXPUNGED], it’s easy!
 
SCP-406538 puts a strainer in a sink and places a metal pot full of water on a stove, putting a head of lettuce inside of the pot.
 
Dr. Bright: Are you sure you know how to make lettuce? Because I don’t thi-
 
SCP-406538: Relax, I’ve got this all under control.
 
SCP-406538 turns to find an item to stir the pot with and the lettuce immediately catches on fire, causing  
[REDACTED]
 
 
Addendum 406538-B
 
The man who SCP-406538 claims to be it’s husband was found [DATA EXPUNGED] at [DATA EXPUNGED]. The house was destroyed by fire, and it appears to originate from the kitchen area. Class A amnesiacs have been administered to all residents of the town.
 
SCP-406538 appears to have no memory of this incident.

@Ping_chan  
Well, “grammar nazi” is a shithead expression anyway, so…

Wait, so does her chest fluff actually give her power over people, or is it just like cuddling a fluffy dog and people just find her too adorable not to help?

@Turbotowns  
I personally like ‘Grammar Nazis in the comments’ but since I’m not involved in this grammar battle, I’m not going to tag it. :d

Can we have a “grammar discussion in the comments” tag? XD

@Blissey1
 
Oh. Never mind then.

@Blissey1
 
Okay, the thing I find funniest about all of this is that we’re arguing about the grammatical construction of a government document.
 
Anyways, ran the fragment through several online grammar checkers and they’ve all came up that it’s grammatically correct.

@YetAnotherBrony  
no, in this case you have “an amount” of something and dexterity is simply describing what it is an amount of.
 
the a/an is attached to “amount”, not “dexterity”

@Jackarunda
 
It is in some situations: “He flourished his tools with a great amount of dexterity.”
 
_{why is English so weird and irregular}

ABSOLUTELY EXCELLENT.
 
Also, dexterity is not a countable noun. Blissey1 is correct.

@Turbotowns  
“Only” 3000 official SCPs because people hadn’t filled these three thousand yet. The number is increased as needed.

@Background Pony #35A0  

 
I kinda already pointed all that out here @Blissey1
 
and I have certainly never heard dexterity used with a/an. “demonstrated a dexterity of” sounds really freaking weird
 
“His hands demonstrated prodigious dexterity” sounds way better

@Blissey1  
Sounds like you.  
“possess an exceptional oral dexterity” is absolutely correct. Exceptional and oral both modify dexterity. Also, “an/a” can certainly be used with the word “dexterity”. “His hands demonstrated a dexterity of prodigious skill”.

@Blissey1  
I forgot to mention that the one instance that immediately came to mind where “dexterities” would be completely appropriate is when rolling up multiple characters or making multiple saving throw checks in an RPG.
 
a blog post discussing this very thing  
“Outputs” and “outcomes” I can understand, both could refer in context to multiple distinct possibilities, but “pasts”?  
 
That would only be valid when talking about instances like the given example of East/West Germany or other divided experiences like White/Black America.

@TexasUberAlles  
but saying something along the lines of “The dexterity of those involved in each task” would cover that kind of situation as well. At least not in common day to day speech.
 
interestingly, I found a blog post discussing this very thing