“Why are you doing this?” hollared Doug as he fought against the bonds that held him fast to the wooden chair. “What sort of ransom do you think you can get for me?!”

The shadowy man chuckled low in his throat. “No, Mr. Walker,” he said in a chillingly deep voice, “we do not want your money.” He stepped just short of entering the light that illuminated Doug in the otherwise pitch black room and reached into the glow, holding a small pink toy pony in his hand. “All we want… is for you to brush the pony.”

Doug felt a twinge of panic in his gut; surely he had been abducted by mad men! “W-what?!”

“We will untie you,” said the shadowy man in complete, somber seriousness, “and you will brush the pony. Then you may eat the Happy Meal it came in, should you desire it. It is a cheeseburger.”

“You mean, all I have to do is brush the pony and you’ll let me go?” said Doug with a sense of hope.

“When you are finished,” said the shadowy man, “you will sit in the bean bag chair. We have some children’s programming for you to watch.”

“Who are you people?!” screamed Doug as he twisted and writhed in a vain attempt to free himself.

“We…” began the shadowy man, “are not people. We are a force. A vision. We know the truth, even if you do not. Struggle all you wish, Mr. Walker, for there is no escape. Within the week you will brush the pony, watch the pony, love the pony. Whether you want to or not.”

Doug threw back his head and screamed. Screamed until his lungs had expelled all their air and he fell lifelessly into the chair.