SPIDERS! A GREAT BIG LEGION OF SPIDERS  
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@The Smiling Pony  
I probably gave off the wrong impression there. I’m not a PETA nut or anything, and I’m absolutely okay with killing animals that need to be disposed of if they get in the house, particularly if they’re creepy crawlies. Oh, and mice, though that part makes me kinda squeamish. It’s just the little personal touch of doing it by hand rather than impersonally gassing or poisoning them all that somewhat disturbed me there. But yeah, I guess if there’s enough of them, you’d probably get fed up enough to toss even the most adorable thing to the metaphorical wolves.

@Lawful Girly  
The point is animals eat animals. Those grasshoppers would’ve just jumped into the webs themselves, or get done in by a bird or lizard or whatever. It’s not so much torture as giving the spider a free meal. Doesn’t help the grasshoppers’ case that they’re pests and mess things up for everyone.
 
You ever had ants or termites invade your home? As noble as it may seem to pick them all up and toss them out, the best solutions to that sort of thing involve killing them all. Usually with terrible poisons or chemicals.

@TexasUberAlles  
Well, pest disposal is one thing, hence my hatred of spiders, but that kinda seems like torture.  
Also, I don’t have pets, but how would that affect it? The only pet I can think of that would require a live small animal to feed is a snake.

@Lawful Girly  
Then you’ve never met a South Texas grasshopper, which is not “small” and not so much “an animal” as “a biblical plague”.
 
…Also, do you feed your dog/cat an all-vegetable diet? Just wonderin’.

@TexasUberAlles  
I’m pretty sure murdering small animals is a warning sign of psychopathy. Just sayin’.

@TexasUberAlles  
I don’t think spiders are awesome. However, spiders seem to have it in their heads that I am awesome. I have lived in so many places, and one constant remains: Spiders.
 
Not small spiders. Not “daddy long legs” spiders. Not “house spiders”. No, I’m talking about huge-ass make footstep noises spiders. Make webs-thick-enough-to catch-birds spiders. And every region has their variety of “oh, you really don’t want to mess with this species. How the hell did it get in your home?” type.
 
Seriously, I’m starting to get a little dicked off. I generally don’t mind the things and just shoo them away, but every once in a while there’s that brave asshole spider with a body the size of a dime that crawls over my keyboard while I’m using it or I find waiting on my flipping pillow. and it’s just gonna get killed.
 
I’m not scared of the damn things, mind. I’m from West Texas, I’ve dealt with waves of tarantulas crawling over everything (including me), tiny “this one will probably stop your heart” and huge black an yellow striped beasts that eat mice, but god damn it. A man has a limit.
 
Mostly the “this is going to leave a huge stain” limit.
 
At least they’re not ants, though. Fuck those things.

Okay but this argument is invalid because spiders are cooler than school and they are badass little bug-murderin’ machines. A shifty-eyed cat and some spiders in the corners and you are functionally immune to cockroaches, man.
 
I cannot be the only one who spent my childhood catching grasshoppers in the yard and tossing them up under the eaves of the house into the webs of the giant thumb-sized garden spiders we get around here, because grasshoppers are assholes and garden spiders are friggin’ awesome.

@Morfean  
Good old Bogleech.

@Morfean  
Oh, good, I hadn’t been condescended to yet, today.

@Morfean  

@Morfean  
Well, some are better than others.  

@Dylanius  

@Morfean  

@Lawful Girly
 
“I am disappoint”
 

@Morfean  
Small…scuttling things…unsettling.

@Lawful Girly
 
“Wai do u hate me. Wai”
 

@Morfean  
“…Cocaine? COCAINE?”  

@Morfean  
HNNNNNNGGGGG!!!!!

Spider spam, spider spam,  
Won’t make me a spider fan.