(I’ve gotten some people requesting that I review One Bad Apple a few times… and since the other S3 episodes I haven’t reviewed didn’t exactly give me a lot to work with, I felt I’ll give this a go. This is all off the top of my head.
 
-Twilight Crackle)
 
And now it’s time for Bum Reviews with Chester A. Bum.
 
Tonight’s review: My Little Pony, One Bad Apple
 
OOOOOOOOOOOOH MY GOD THIS IS THE GREATEST EPISODE I’VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!
 
Babs Seed Babs SPOILERS!
 
There’s this little filly, named Apple Bloom!
 
And she’s excited to hear that her cousin from manehattan, Babs Seed, is coming over to visit!
 
And she’s really excited because Babs doesn’t have her cutie mark, either!
 
So she and the CMCs wait at the train station with Applejack!
 
And they’re like:
 
Insert chaotic excited children voices here
 
And Applejack is like:
 
“Ah wish ah had an obscure simile to say about this.”
 
So Babs Seed arrives, and the CMCs are like:
 
chaotic excited children voices here
 
And Babs is like:
 
Yeah, it’s cool to be here, too, I guess…
 
So the CMCs want to make her a part of their club!
 
And they’re like:
 
“Look at all the cool stuff about being in our club! And it’s all devoted to helping fillies get their cutie marks!”
 
And Babs is like:
 
“Uh, yeah, sounds kinda cool…”
 
So they try to impress Babs by showing off their parade float!
 
But then Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara come in and start making fun of them!
 
And then they’re like:
 
“Hey, you may be a blank flank, but at least you’re from Manehattan! You’re not going to join their lame club, are you?”
 
And Babs is like:
 
“Uh… NO! No way! I’m totally sticking with you two!”
 
And so Babs wrecks the parade float!
 
And the two bullies are like:
 
“Yay! Wanton destruction pleases us!”
 
Are these two related to Michael Bay?
 
Seriously, they just need to have a fetish for explosions, racist stereotypes, and half-naked women and they’d pretty much be his clones!
 
So Apple Bloom threatens to tell on her!
 
But Babs is like:
 
“What are you, a snitch?”
 
And Scootaloo is like:
 
“Well, it’s better than being a chicken…”
 
So they decide not to tell Applejack because, you know, they don’t want to be snitches!
 
And what do they decide to do instead?
 
Avoid her!
 
And sing a pop song about it!
 
But then Babs and the bullies take over the CMC clubhouse!
 
gasp
 
So what do they do?
 
They make a booby-trapped parade float for the parade the next day!
 
So the next day, they have the float all set up!
 
And when they see Babs they’re like:
 
(Sarcastically) Oh, I’m sure glad Babs isn’t going to ride with us in this! Wouldn’t it be such a bummer if she stole it from us? It’s ours, our own, our precious!
 
God I’m high.
 
So Babs is like:
 
Yoink!
 
And as she’s driving off, the CMCs are like:
 
This’ll teach her! Once that timer runs out, she’s gonna get it!
 
But then Applejack comes up and is like:
 
Aw, how nice of y’all! After all the bullying she’s been through back home over her blank flank, this is real nice!
 
And the CMCs are like:
 
Oh snap.
 
So then they’re really depressed because they realized that they turned into bullies, themselves!
 
So they decide to go running after the float to stop it!
 
And they commandeer Pinkie Pie’s lettuce float!
 
So they drive up to Babs’ float and they’re like:
 
“Get out of the float! It’s booby-trapped!”
 
And Babs is like:
 
“You’re not getting this float back!”
 
And then she causes the lettuce float to crash!
 
And Pinkie Pie is like:
 
“Veggie Salad!”
 
I’m high and even I don’t get that!
 
So it turns out the float was rigged to have the steering mess up so it goes falling into a lake!
 
But the CMCs push Babs out of the float just in time!
 
And Babs is like:
 
“Wow… after all the crap I put you through, you still saved me… why?”
 
And the CMCs are like:
 
“We booby-trapped the float, trying to get back at you, but then we heard about what happened in Manehattan… so we’re really sorry about that.”
 
And Babs is like:
 
“I’m sorry too… can we start over?”
 
And the CMCs are like:
 
“Yeah! Let’s do it!”
 
So they induct Babs into the Cutie Mark Crusaders club!
 
And then she leaves!
 
But before she does, she promises to tell her own sister about her problems with bullying, and stands up for her friends in front of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon!
 
The End!
 
This is Chester A. Bum saying,
 
CHANGE! YA GOT CHANGE? Ah come on, help a pony out, will ya? Come on, change!
 
Come on, I need more crack to smoke so I can stand up to the bullies on my street corner!