“Lead balloon.”
 
I am now imagining someone swinging a balloon filled with lead like a morningstar and hitting someone with it.

what about enraged weasels?

No lead balloon? That’s cute.  

DO NOT TAUNT HAPPY FUN BALL

But… why SHOULDN’T I tie Pinkie Pie to another pony?

“Do not inflate pony.”
 
I do what I want.

These are killin’ me. I definitely needed this today.

@Background Human  
That’s just being silly.

@SquiggyBomb  
Ties a multiplicity of balloons to your butt :D

@Background Human  
Only if one of them is Bobcat Goldthwait.

@Zennistrad  
And yet, there will be at least one player in the party who insists on sticking her hand into it to see if it gives her magic powers.

Well to be fair, if someone suddenly tied a balloon to my butt I’d be pretty confused too.

I want a “how to confuse a baby dragon” one.

Orb of annihilation? That sounds dangerous.

Are three angry bobcats acceptable?

Ponies seem easy to confuse.

“Do not inflate pony”
 
I beg to differ.