Artist’s comment:

Empty Bottle looked up from the magazine he was reading in my Royal Equestria Security Forces (RESF) dreamscape. Over the sound of the radio playing and random highway traffic outside his bar he’d heard the distinctive sound of a large single cylinder motorcycle engine pull into the bar’s parking lot and then shut off.

The bar was technically open for business but at the moment there was no customers in it. Keeping an eye on the front door the shaggy turquoise blue earth pony reached under the bar and unsnapped the safety strap on the leather scabbard attached to the underside of the bar. The scabbard held a shotgun. He kept his right hand on the stock and his eyes on the front door.

Nothing happened. As the seconds piled up Empty Bottle grew more and more antsy. After what seemed like an eternity the stallion called out to his younger brother and co-owner Leaky Tap who was counting inventory in the back. Empty now realized he hadn’t heard his brother moving around in back there for awhile.

“Hey Leaky! Leaky! Hey ya piece shit answer me! Wutz goin on back there?!” Growing more nervous by the instant the stallion pulled the shotgun from the scabbard. Now his attention was divided between the front door and the doorway leading to back to the bathrooms and the stockroom.

Suddenly the front door swung open. Empty Bottle worked the pump action and leveled the shotgun at….a random unicorn stallion who froze in the doorway and raised his hands.

“Whoa! Whoa! Shit! Okay! I git it! Yer not open! I’ll git a beer somewhere else!” The stallion quickly backed out of the doorway and disappeared from view.

Now shaking and his gaze locked on the open doorway Empty Bottle lowered the shotgun. “Damn it Leaky! What da fuck r’ ya doin’ back there?!” He roared. Still not getting a response the stallion turned to see what the fuck was up with his damn brother. As he turned to his left the earth pony found himself staring into fiery eyes of Two Tone who was just inches away from him.

Empty’s brain was attempting to process this new development when the zebra reached out with gloved hands and snatched the shotgun out of the stallion’s. In one continuous motion she drove the butt plate of the shotgun back and up into the stallion’s jaw sending him toppling down against one of the glass doors of the bar refrigerator. The mare then spun the shotgun around and fired a round of buckshot into the glass door next to the stallion. In a thunderous roar the glass door shattered and a dozen bottles of beer in the fridge exploded spraying the stallion and floor with beer and pieces of glass. The stallion was now curled up on the floor with his arms over his head.

Without saying a word Two Tone worked the pump and loaded a fresh shell into the chamber. Finally she spoke. “Empty. Where’s shit I ordered from you? You know. The fucking shit I’ve already paid for!”

Slowly Empty Bottle lowered his arms he looked up at the mare. “Two Tone! Sugar! Wutz with da violence! I’m not tryin ta screw ya or double cross ya! I was–”

The stallion’s monologue was abruptly interrupted by another blast of buckshot which destroyed even more bottles of beer in the ruined fridge. Once again Two Tone pumped the action and chambered another shell.

“If you weren’t planning to screw me over why were you waiting for me with this!” The mare punctuated her statement by putting another load of 00 into the floorboards between the stallions legs. Wood splinters went flying everywhere.“Fucking street broom!” She worked the action again and leveled the muzzle at the stallion’s head. “And don’t count on your brother helping you out. He’s taking a nap!”

Empty Bottle was now curled up in a quivering ball on the floor. “I, I, I swear I’ll git da stuff fer ya! I just need bit mur time!”

“That’s what you said the last two times!” Roared the zebra. “Look! I have a client who’s working on a fucking short timeline!

You’re already 3 days behind on the agreed delivery date! I paid you fucking top bits for the stuff! Money that was provided by my client, and my client really doesn’t like being delayed or disappointed! Now! You need delivery the goods to me by 9am tomorrow morning, or give back me the damn money!”

Slowly the terrified stallion sat back up his pants were drenched. Either from beer or something else provided by the stallion himself. He raised a trembling hand toward the mare who still had the shotgun leveled at him. “L,l,l,look. I,I,I don’t have da bits on me. M,m,my source at the local hospital has had trouble! In da last month or so it’s gotten ruffer ta score stuff from der alchemic place! They dun changed da rules or sumthin! Makes it tricky ta sneak shit out from there!”

Two Tone clenched her jaw. “Empty if you knew you weren’t able to get what I paid for in advance why did you take the job and the money? Your promises are as empty as your name! Let me explain it to you again. Either get me the fucking goods by 9am tomorrow. Or you better have the fucking bits to hand back to me, and Empty if you don’t have the stuff or the money it won’t be me you’ll be dealing with next time. It’ll be my client, and if you think I’m bad. It’ll be ten times worse if they have to get directly involved! Do you understand what I am saying?”

The stallion looked up at the zebra and slowly nodded her head. Two Tone’s nostrils flared. “Okay then. The usual meeting place. Bring the shit or the bits. And Empty. Don’t even think about bailing on me. You won’t get far, and it’ll take a very, very long time for you to die. Get it?”

“Ya, ya I git it.” Said the stallion softly.

Two Tone looked him up and down one last time and then silently walked away with the shotgun. Passing through the back stockroom she stepped over an unconscious body. Exiting the back of the establishment the zebra tossed the shotgun into a nearby dumpster. Then she walked to her dual-sport bike. She started the engine and put on her helmet. Then she rode off into the muggy late Ft. Trotterdale afternoon.